Anti-Bullying Week: What to do if you think your child is being bullied

Posted: 12th November 2025

At SELFA, we believe every child deserves to feel safe, valued and supported. Belonging, happiness and kindness are at the heart of what we do, and standing up to bullying is a vital part of that mission.

Bullying can have a serious impact on a child’s confidence and wellbeing. Sadly, more than one in five children in the UK experience frequent bullying and those with SEND or from low-income families are even more at risk. With so much of young people’s lives now online, nearly one in six adolescents have experienced cyberbullying, according to an international study by the World Health Organization (WHO).

During Anti-Bullying Week, we’re shining a light on how to spot the signs and support your child – and what we do at SELFA to help them rebuild their confidence.

signs of bullying

“The signs of bullying can include changes in behaviour, such as withdrawal from friends, usual activities and reluctance to go to school, changing in eating or sleeping habits,” says Naomi Pickard, children and young people’s worker (mental health) at SELFA.

“Other signs might be lost or damaged belongings or unexplained injuries. Your child might avoid social situations or have increased feelings of sadness, anxiety or low self-esteem.”

They may have unexplained tummy aches or headaches or show signs of anxiety or distress on a Sunday night or at the end of the school holidays. Some children may become quieter, while others may play up. Another sign of bullying can include seeming upset after using their phone, tablet or computer.

Ultimately, though, you know your child best. If you suspect something is wrong, you can take steps to support them.

Choose the right time to talk

Pick a time where you can give your child your full attention and let them open up if they feel able to. It can help to talk about how they’re feeling. It’s important to stay calm, even if you’re upset or angry. Your child might be feeling scared or embarrassed.

“Listen to your child, validate their feelings, let them know it’s normal to feel upset about bullying and reassure them that it’s not their fault,” says Pickard.

“Keep a record of any incidents and keep open communication with school about what is happening so that they can help to intervene.”

Help them understand their feelings

Some children may benefit from being able to draw or write their feelings down. This can be useful if they’re confused or ashamed about what’s happening – and can be a good outlet for understanding their emotions.

It’s also important to help build their confidence and resilience. Remind them that being treated badly isn’t their fault and that they’re loved and valued. Help them find things to do that make them feel good, like crafts, sports, reading or clubs.

Talk about what friendship is

At SELFA, we often talk about what kindness and true friendship looks like.

In one of our ‘wellbeing cafe’ groups for primary-school aged children – safe, supportive places where young people can get confidential support and advice – children explored the importance of listening and sharing. The children also made friendship bracelets and keyrings – because being creative is a great way to build connections and celebrate the joy of friendship.

In other groups, children and young people were encouraged to wear bright, mismatched socks for Odd Sock Day (10th November) to celebrate individuality and inclusivity.

“Our Bentham primary group had a discussion about Anti-Bullying Week and the importance of kindness,” says Nicole Morgan, a children & young people’s worker at SELFA. “The group came up with ideas of how to be kind, such as including people in games and sharing. We ended the session with team games encouraging positive communication, resilience and helping each other.”

Children at SELFA Inspire, a transition group for Year 6 children aimed to prepare them for secondary school, made posters about kindness.

“It shows we are all amazing and unique,” one child said.